Vladimir Putin: "Hey girl, I hope my letter impresses you as much as this photo of me tenderly stroking a cat." Photo: Alexei Druzhinin
Isn't it fun when politicians who are the antithesis of feminism attempt to cash in on the movement?
Vladimir Putin sure isn't the first to have done so, but his effort for International Women's Day this year might just be the most entertaining.
The Russian president has penned a flowery open letter thanking women for performing their role of having babies AND propping up the economy AND doing it all with a smile.
All very important reasons why men like him are thankful that women exist.
"Dear women, you possess a mysterious power: you keep up with everything juggle a myriad of tasks, and yet remain tender, unforgettable and full of charm," Putin wrote. "You bring goodness and beauty, hope and light into this world. We are proud of you and we love you."
The holiday is of particular significance in Russia, where women are routinely imprisoned for their efforts in fighting for the rights of women and humans in general, Putin said.
Sorry, this is what he actually said: "Russia celebrates this holiday with particular love, probably more so than any other country. It is a holiday filled with gifts and flowers and with our warmest, fondest feelings for our mothers, wives, daughters, colleagues and all the women close to our hearts.
"After all, it is women who give us life and warm us with their love, support and care. It is women, with their dignity and compassion, who incarnate Russia's true soul."
Holding off the urge to laugh/vomit, I'd hazard the following letter in response:
Dear Putin (and other disingenuous world leaders),
International Women's Day - which used to be called International Working Women's Day - is not a day for you to appreciate how nice and helpful we are to you.
It's a day for acknowledging the struggles of women past and present to be liberated from the shackles of capitalist patriarchy, and to commit to continuing the fight for equality and independence.
If this doesn't align with your views and policies, butt out of it.
Your patronising letters of "thanks" are worthless to women, except as a reminder of the gross attitudes that the powerful continue to hold about our place and purpose in society.