Behind The Cleanse
The Italians have this fantastic word, sprezzatura, and it translates into English as something like "studied carelessness". It's a lot of fun to say. Try it next time your friend deflects your compliment about her new designer dress with mock surprise and a "This old thing?" reply. I like to point my index finger skyward when I yell it, "Sprezzatura!" as if I am catching the person in the middle of some dark act of debauchery. Or, alternatively, declaring war on their lies. It's also been described as "rehearsed spontaneity" and can probably be seen at music festivals everywhere.
It was "sprezzatura" that sprung to mind when I heard that a young lady of Italian descent, the venerable Stefani Germanotta (Lady Gaga to you and me), told a magazine last month that her cleansing routine consists of, oohh, just a wee little scrub with Ivory soap, as recommended by her mother. The cleanser for all the expertly layered, theatrically clownish paint that would make a drag queen blush - Ivory soap! When she cleanses, that is. For Gaga also "confessed" to wearing her make-up to bed every night. Uh-huh. Oh, no. I believe you, Gaga.
Of course I do. I mean, you obviously just threw on that white lace bee-keeping costume to your sister's graduation two years ago because it was the only clean outfit on your bedroom floor, so I totally accept that you just sort of ... can't really be bothered taking care of your visage.
Gaga did admit that all that smudging of make-up from her pillow was bad for her skin but she added that she was "blessed with good genes", which I guess means she's not suffering the acne fall-out. Well, Gaga, I wasn't born that way.
(In case you thought I was becoming overzealous with the italics, I would like to announce in these brackets that the above joke is a pun on her latest single, Born This Way. Also, a single is another name for a song. What? I thought you might not know that! Sorry!) Well, my cleansing routine is less nonchalant than Gaga's.
It has to be, considering the amount of trans fats and refined sugars I ingest.
If that's not bad enough, I have what is diplomatically called "combination skin", so I need all the help I can get.